I was casually making use of the iMacintosh by Apple Computers, I being a member of the public with all my statutory rights, innocent characteristics and modest intentions. The last thing I expected was to have the so-called “uncrashable” machine – “My god, it’s uncrashable!!” they proclaimed, crash. “False!” said I as I managed to do just that.

All I had tried to do was open MSN Messenger by dictating verbal commands in Arabic through a toilet roll attached to one of the keyboards USB Ports, which I was told is possible with an iMac. Not only was I shocked and disappointed when it crashed, but I felt empty. Why me? I wondered. Iain Rawson, who was in the room at the time offered no emotional support, just various unhelpful and unsuccessful instructions to solve the problem.

Luckily there is one resolution that all computers and Macs are compatible with, so I pulled out the plug. Then I sat back to enjoy my glass of chilled coke and that was that.

Article Written by Jay