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Signs that you are too drunk
Sign that you are too drunk: The roof and the floor are spinning at two different speeds
Sign that you are too drunk: You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
Sign that you are too drunk: You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Sign that you are too drunk: Job interfering with your drinking.
Sign that you are too drunk: Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
Sign that you are too drunk: Career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusetts.
Sign that you are too drunk: The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
Sign that you are too drunk: Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.
Sign that you are too drunk: 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!
Sign that you are too drunk: Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
Sign that you are too drunk: You can focus better with one eye closed.
Sign that you are too drunk: The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
Sign that you are too drunk: You fall off the floor...
Sign that you are too drunk: Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
Sign that you are too drunk: Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, forget dinner!
Sign that you are too drunk: Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you
Sign that you are too drunk: At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."
Sign that you are too drunk: Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
Sign that you are too drunk: You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm.
Sign that you are too drunk: The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...
Sign that you are too drunk: You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine, Alcohol, and [Women or Men].
Sign that you are too drunk: Every night you're beginning to find your roommate's cat more and more attractive.
Sign that you are too drunk: Roseanne looks good.
Sign that you are too drunk: Don't recognize wife unless seen through bottom of glass.
Sign that you are too drunk: That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
Sign that you are too drunk: Senators Kennedy and Packwood shake their heads when they walk past you.
Sign that you are too drunk: When you say: "I'm as jober as a sudge."
Sign that you are too drunk: The shrubbery's drunk from too frequent watering.
Sign that you are too drunk: You wake up screaming "TORO TORO TORO!" in the middle of the night.